Life throws at us all sort of curve balls. Many situations arise each and every day against us. Some bring fear. Some bring despair. Some seem very real. And for some, we see through the act. There are days when we can easily overcome mountains and there are days when we tremble and lose hope at the sight of some mountains. We often look at the inclines, cliffs and edgy parts of the stones and then think of how things could go wrong. We lose sight on what could go right.
Most of the things we face in this life are just shadows. I would love to believe everything is in fact just a shadow. No matter how big it may be, it is all a shadow. And the trick that life plays on us, is that very often, the shadow isn't a true reflection of it's owner. There's a lot of trickery involved in the whole thing. Many shadows seem very huge while the force behind it is very tiny.
Before running away from a shadow, first find out its source. Many times you will be surprised when you find out it is a very tiny force. Do not always assume that a problem is huge because fro far it looks huge. Get closer and dissect it. Get deeper into it and understand it. Only when you focus on the source, will shadows stop making you tremble.
The shadow may be huge, but your fear shouldn't.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
Showing posts with label Depression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Depression. Show all posts
Monday, 11 November 2019
Monday, 20 May 2019
WE ALL HAVE A HISTORY
Everyone has a history. It might be bad, good or both. But we all have some sort of history, some of which we are proud of and some which we are not. Part it is all part of who we are. It is a chapter in the story of our life and will follow us forever. It tells of where we have been before, and not necessarily where we are now.
There those of us whom when we have a bad history, or a history we are not proud of, we face it head on. We look back and see what went wrong, accept that we did something wrong and try to do better. We accept that it is part of our story and will stick to us no matter where we go. We understand that when we tell our story, it will be part of it, because it is our history. We own our mistakes and try to do better. And when you do that, you are not afraid of your history. It is not some boogeyman you are constantly scared will come out.
But there those who just try to shove it away and think it will just vanish and no longer become part of their lives. They do all they can to avoid it, even if it means lying to everyone about their past. They fail to understand that by accepting the past, it doesn't mean you are proud of it. We as humans are sometimes too proud to admit when we are wrong. We try to point fingers at others in order to avoid accepting our mistakes. We would rather be victims and blame others than own up to it. And when it fails, we try to run away from our past without dealing with it.
The truth is, when you are matured enough, you understand that your past just shows your mistakes which made you the better person whom you are today. It shows you've seen your wrongs and have changed to be a better person. You've learned from your mistakes. But to lie and try to hide your past is a sign of weakness. A sign that you didn't learn. A sign that you didn't change. And the worst thing about history is that it always comes back. The last thing you want is for your history to destroy something special you have today because you tried to hide through lies and scheming. When you accept it and are open about it, you live with no fear of it popping back up. It cannot be used against you.
Face your history and never lie about. Talk about it before someone else drops it like a bomb at the moment when you least expect it. When you are open about it, you are never scared of it being brought up because you have faced it. You cannot erase or rewrite your history through lies or running. You only get to write a new life by accepting your past, learning from it and doing things differently.
The truth shall set you free.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
There those of us whom when we have a bad history, or a history we are not proud of, we face it head on. We look back and see what went wrong, accept that we did something wrong and try to do better. We accept that it is part of our story and will stick to us no matter where we go. We understand that when we tell our story, it will be part of it, because it is our history. We own our mistakes and try to do better. And when you do that, you are not afraid of your history. It is not some boogeyman you are constantly scared will come out.
But there those who just try to shove it away and think it will just vanish and no longer become part of their lives. They do all they can to avoid it, even if it means lying to everyone about their past. They fail to understand that by accepting the past, it doesn't mean you are proud of it. We as humans are sometimes too proud to admit when we are wrong. We try to point fingers at others in order to avoid accepting our mistakes. We would rather be victims and blame others than own up to it. And when it fails, we try to run away from our past without dealing with it.
The truth is, when you are matured enough, you understand that your past just shows your mistakes which made you the better person whom you are today. It shows you've seen your wrongs and have changed to be a better person. You've learned from your mistakes. But to lie and try to hide your past is a sign of weakness. A sign that you didn't learn. A sign that you didn't change. And the worst thing about history is that it always comes back. The last thing you want is for your history to destroy something special you have today because you tried to hide through lies and scheming. When you accept it and are open about it, you live with no fear of it popping back up. It cannot be used against you.
Face your history and never lie about. Talk about it before someone else drops it like a bomb at the moment when you least expect it. When you are open about it, you are never scared of it being brought up because you have faced it. You cannot erase or rewrite your history through lies or running. You only get to write a new life by accepting your past, learning from it and doing things differently.
The truth shall set you free.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
Monday, 29 April 2019
A CARING CIRCLE
I wasn't planning to write about this today, but a lot has happened which has led to me writing this. I am writing it out of a concerned and caring heart for each and everyone of you out there.
Times are not getting easier for anyone, especially with the current global economic downswing. Many people have gotten used to the life they had before and sometimes it's just too hard to downgrade. Many who have put up a front of living the good life cannot/do not want to live anything less. And this has created a very big problem which many are not aware of. Abuse and psychological issues.
We often see those around us, including friends, showing off the good life on. Be it in person or on social media, these people always seem to be happy. And we as they close friends or loved ones, encourage such behavior. Our comments, and behavior around these people, though not meant to harm, actually do harm. We are often not too real with these people. And sometimes they do not feel free around us. What we need is an open environment with loved ones. A real environment of truth and openness wherein we are all free to express how we feel.
With regards to women, this good life chase, can at times be a mask to hide the abuse. And if we as such a person's friends do not make her feel free enough to open up without fear of shaming, then we are failing as friends. Both male and female friends of such a person should make the person feel free enough to talk about anything. We need to be real friends to those around us, and not just the 'rich' one but all of our friends. There have recently been many cases of women who were being abused but hiding behind the good life. There are many more out there, and it takes you and me by being friends to actually get these people to open up. And when they do, we ought to make them feel protected, with no shaming or judgments.
Another issue is with regards to emotional and psychological states. This is something that can affect anyone, and society doesn't want to openly talk about it. Many people who took their lives could've been saved had they had good friends who listen. Often times we can tell when someone is not alright. But instead of making the person feel free to open up and reassuring them our love and protection, we carry on as if everything is normal. And when we lose the person, we then want to claim we loved them. Sometimes it takes just a hug and reminding your friends how much you love them, in order for them to open up.
I urge you all to go out and be positive and observant. Go and be great support system. Be real with those around you. Remind them that it's okay to cry and ask for help. Show them your support and protection. You will save someone's life by doing so. Create an open environment which encourages speaking out. Do not be that person who shows love as the coffin goes down. Show the love while the person is still around. Let's us go and change the world and make it an environment where we all grow together and take care of one another.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
Times are not getting easier for anyone, especially with the current global economic downswing. Many people have gotten used to the life they had before and sometimes it's just too hard to downgrade. Many who have put up a front of living the good life cannot/do not want to live anything less. And this has created a very big problem which many are not aware of. Abuse and psychological issues.
We often see those around us, including friends, showing off the good life on. Be it in person or on social media, these people always seem to be happy. And we as they close friends or loved ones, encourage such behavior. Our comments, and behavior around these people, though not meant to harm, actually do harm. We are often not too real with these people. And sometimes they do not feel free around us. What we need is an open environment with loved ones. A real environment of truth and openness wherein we are all free to express how we feel.
With regards to women, this good life chase, can at times be a mask to hide the abuse. And if we as such a person's friends do not make her feel free enough to open up without fear of shaming, then we are failing as friends. Both male and female friends of such a person should make the person feel free enough to talk about anything. We need to be real friends to those around us, and not just the 'rich' one but all of our friends. There have recently been many cases of women who were being abused but hiding behind the good life. There are many more out there, and it takes you and me by being friends to actually get these people to open up. And when they do, we ought to make them feel protected, with no shaming or judgments.
Another issue is with regards to emotional and psychological states. This is something that can affect anyone, and society doesn't want to openly talk about it. Many people who took their lives could've been saved had they had good friends who listen. Often times we can tell when someone is not alright. But instead of making the person feel free to open up and reassuring them our love and protection, we carry on as if everything is normal. And when we lose the person, we then want to claim we loved them. Sometimes it takes just a hug and reminding your friends how much you love them, in order for them to open up.
I urge you all to go out and be positive and observant. Go and be great support system. Be real with those around you. Remind them that it's okay to cry and ask for help. Show them your support and protection. You will save someone's life by doing so. Create an open environment which encourages speaking out. Do not be that person who shows love as the coffin goes down. Show the love while the person is still around. Let's us go and change the world and make it an environment where we all grow together and take care of one another.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
Friday, 5 April 2019
WHY WORRY
In his song Three Little Birds, Bob Marley said " Don't worry about a thing 'Cause every little thing gonna be alright". Everyday we see people worrying. I too worry many times. We as human tend to give worry a lot of power than we should.
I have recently been in a very difficult position. A position wherein I wasn't and still am not sure of what will happen, since all the power to make things work for the best lies in someone's hands. And that is the case with many of us out there. There's always that something that keeps us worrying, which we have no control over. We worry because we do not know what decision or action the person in control will take.
But have you ever asked yourself, 'What will worrying do' ? Will worrying influence the person to take a decision in your favour? Will worrying make things any better? Why then are you wasting your time worrying when you know your worry will do nothing positive for you? Worrying will only take away from your mental and physical health. Worrying is like choosing to pick up a ton and putting it on your back, especially when you have no control over what you are worrying about. It will only hurt you and weigh you down. Let go of the worry because there is nothing it will do for you.
Once you start realising that worrying does nothing for you, you will start seeing that it is a waste of time to worry. Why do something that will not benefit you in any way? Why give it so much power?
Do not be anxious. Do not worry. It will only take away your focus.
I have recently been in a very difficult position. A position wherein I wasn't and still am not sure of what will happen, since all the power to make things work for the best lies in someone's hands. And that is the case with many of us out there. There's always that something that keeps us worrying, which we have no control over. We worry because we do not know what decision or action the person in control will take.
But have you ever asked yourself, 'What will worrying do' ? Will worrying influence the person to take a decision in your favour? Will worrying make things any better? Why then are you wasting your time worrying when you know your worry will do nothing positive for you? Worrying will only take away from your mental and physical health. Worrying is like choosing to pick up a ton and putting it on your back, especially when you have no control over what you are worrying about. It will only hurt you and weigh you down. Let go of the worry because there is nothing it will do for you.
Once you start realising that worrying does nothing for you, you will start seeing that it is a waste of time to worry. Why do something that will not benefit you in any way? Why give it so much power?
Do not be anxious. Do not worry. It will only take away your focus.
1 Peter 5: 6-7
"6 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: 7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you."
Further bible reading: Matthew 6: 25-34
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
Further bible reading: Matthew 6: 25-34
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
Friday, 29 March 2019
SAIL ON
I have recently been going through my old writings which I found in my google drive. It has been a long journey. Travelled to the dark abyss and back to the light again. What a journey it has been. Today's blog is inspired by the reflections that followed after reading everything.
In life, we are like sailors at sea. No one knows what the sea holds for them each day, but we all pray and hope it has the best for us. Some do not even know where they are sailing to. And for those who do, some do not know the way to get to where they want to get to. To those drifting with the oceans, and those who are trying to sail to a destination, remember to enjoy the scenery. The journey itself is just as important as the destination. There is always going to be an element of surprise when you in this sea of life. Some will surprise you, and some will really surprise you.
Then there will be days when there are storms. We only have different boats and thus the behaviour during a storm will be different. But each of us is given a boat according to our strengths. The smaller the boat, the more strength you have, and will gain. Imagine a small wooden fishing boat out at sea in a raging storm. It would definitely take a lot of skills to survive that. And the truth is, we all have it in us to sail that tiny boat to our destination. It might be an island, or another continent, but we have the skills. You have the skill. I have the skills. The oceans will rock you back and fourth, and at times you will see your life flash before your eyes. Do not give in to the ocean. There is always a storm before a calm(haha, I know I switched that).
There might be other sailors around, but none will abandon their ship to come save you, leaving theirs to sink. They may try their best to help in other ways, but do not expect them to drop everything for you. That is how life is. No one will drop everything for you, because each one of us is going to the same storm in the same sea. And you have the strength to make it with the little or no assistance that you have. In the end it will build your character and make you a strong person. Rough seas make the best sailors.You just need to face the fear and tell yourself, I can do this.
This is for all of you out there who might be feeling discouraged, defeated or helpless. You are not helpless. You have yourself and your boat. Keep sailing on. If you stop you will not get to where you are supposed to go. Do not give in. The scary moments will be your battle scars one day. You will look back at where you have been, and be thankful you never gave up. It doesn't matter how hard it gets, or how much it feels like death is upon you.KEEP SAILING ON.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
In life, we are like sailors at sea. No one knows what the sea holds for them each day, but we all pray and hope it has the best for us. Some do not even know where they are sailing to. And for those who do, some do not know the way to get to where they want to get to. To those drifting with the oceans, and those who are trying to sail to a destination, remember to enjoy the scenery. The journey itself is just as important as the destination. There is always going to be an element of surprise when you in this sea of life. Some will surprise you, and some will really surprise you.
Then there will be days when there are storms. We only have different boats and thus the behaviour during a storm will be different. But each of us is given a boat according to our strengths. The smaller the boat, the more strength you have, and will gain. Imagine a small wooden fishing boat out at sea in a raging storm. It would definitely take a lot of skills to survive that. And the truth is, we all have it in us to sail that tiny boat to our destination. It might be an island, or another continent, but we have the skills. You have the skill. I have the skills. The oceans will rock you back and fourth, and at times you will see your life flash before your eyes. Do not give in to the ocean. There is always a storm before a calm(haha, I know I switched that).
There might be other sailors around, but none will abandon their ship to come save you, leaving theirs to sink. They may try their best to help in other ways, but do not expect them to drop everything for you. That is how life is. No one will drop everything for you, because each one of us is going to the same storm in the same sea. And you have the strength to make it with the little or no assistance that you have. In the end it will build your character and make you a strong person. Rough seas make the best sailors.You just need to face the fear and tell yourself, I can do this.
This is for all of you out there who might be feeling discouraged, defeated or helpless. You are not helpless. You have yourself and your boat. Keep sailing on. If you stop you will not get to where you are supposed to go. Do not give in. The scary moments will be your battle scars one day. You will look back at where you have been, and be thankful you never gave up. It doesn't matter how hard it gets, or how much it feels like death is upon you.KEEP SAILING ON.
WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba
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