IMPORTANT NOTICE

Hello guys.

I just thought i should let you know that I will not be able to write for a few weeks due to some terrible events that took place Firday 22 February. I will be back as soon as I am over the whole thing.

Report all crime near you. Even if it is someone you know and love.

APPRECIATE

What a world we live in. A world filled with adventures, misfortunes, joy and sadness. It all happens whenever it wants to and nothing we do or say can stop it from happening if it's meant to happen. It is all part of life. There's so much beauty in this life. This world is truly infinite. 

Let's consider the beauty of meeting new people and appreciating people around us. This is something I feel is important to talk about because our world lacks regarding appreciating people around us. When we live we always meet new people each with their own character. Some of them are angels, and some are demons. But my focus is on the angels, as I wouldn't advice that you keep demons around you. We meet people and sometimes we fall in love. Sometimes we become friends. But often we forget the importance of the person until they are gone. We never stop to appreciate the person until it's too late.

What usually happens is that when we meet good people, we often take them for granted and assume they will always be like that. We think to ourselves, "he/she will never forsake me" or "he/she will always love me". While it may be true that a person may always love you, it is foolish to assume that such a person can never leave. With most of these assumptions, we end up taking advantage of the person. We use their kindness and love against them. Each time we are the ones always being forgiven for something. We are the ones always being assisted. We develop a feeling of being untouchable and start thinking it's because we are smart. Slowly with time we end up thinking we can get away with anything. Instead of appreciating and doing good in return, we just use the other person for our own satisfaction. The other person sacrifices all, but we choose to carry on doing as we please. Sometimes we spend our time trying to please those who do not even notice us or care about us, while mistreating the one person who would walk a thousand miles for us. 

Unfortunately, most times this doesn't end very well. Something is bound to go wrong that will expose everything that has been happening. And usually this happens around the time when we need the person most. When need all the sacrifice that person has been doing. But by then it is too late, and the person is tired of forgiving or sacrificing everything. It is a point where the person has realised they were being taken advantage of and it is time to walk away. At that stage, we often look back in regret and wish we could take back our action. But we had all the time to change and didn't change. We had all the time to do what's right, but we chose to be 'smart'. In the end there's no one to blame but us.

Never take advantage of a person because you never know when you will need them most. Always remind them of how much you appreciate them and be kind to them. 

WITH LOVE...

Mbuelo Ramafamba 

WE ARE ALL JUST PIECES OF A PUZZLE

Running a blog is not easy. You always must find something with value to offer your readers. It's much harder when you are first starting out and having a small circle of readers. It is easy to give up everything. However, it takes a special form of realisation to be able to carry on writing even if it means only one person reading your blog.

Everyone is equally important. It is the realisation of this that has given me strength to write again. Even if there was only one soul reading my blogs, I'd still carry on because that one person is just as important as a thousand people. Besides helping me to write again, it has taught me a very powerful lesson about life and people. These days it is very easy to disregard a person simply because we think we do not need them. With the influence of social media and the desire to fit into the higher class, we often find ourselves discarding people. Sometimes we feel that we are way above such people or better than them. 

We fail to understand that we are all like pieces to a puzzle. Without that one person, the puzzle is not complete. Everyone we come across has a purpose to serve. Some bring us memories, and some give us lesson. While this may sound like it's against discarding a person, it isn’t. What this is against, is discarding someone from the moment we meet them. It's okay to cut off someone after they have hurt you or 'taught you a lesson'. But do not just simply judge a book by its cover. Many times, I too, have been disregarded before the person even knew my name. And funny enough, most times the people end up realising the mistake they have made but by then they have missed out on a lot. Sometimes the very same people end needing my help. I am not innocent myself either. I am guilty of having done it before.

Give everyone a chance because you never know when/if you will need the person tomorrow. That person you are being rude to because they aren't your type or in your class, might hold the answer to your success one day. That same person might help you in life threatening circumstances. Remember to be kind to everyone, so they remember your kindness next time you need their assistance. And never say never. 

WITH LOVE...

Mbuelo Ramafamba

LISTEN

Whoever said listening was skill knew exactly what they were talking about. It one skill that many do not have. It is a skill many are not aware or will not admit that they do not have. And it is one skill that can not be taught by someone else. It is self taught.

It's evident in our everyday life how much people never want to listen. Everybody only wants to be heard, but never wants to listen. We have so many differences today because people just don't want to listen. Everyone is imposing their view on others because they do not want to listen. Without listening you can never understand, and thus you can never assist. People go out creating all sorts of groups but never stop to listen.

Families are getting divided because nobody wants to listen. Everyone is shouting at the top of their lungs trying to be heard but they don't want to listen. Even if given a chance to speak, they still never listen. Most people just want to be heard, but never want to listen. One reason some people don't want to listen is because they do not want to face their reality. They do not want to be told the truth. So they choose to shout and shout, and cry victim when no one wants to listen to them anymore because they do give a chance to others to speak. And then everything goes south after that, because both sides will now want to be heard.

It has become like a disease that is destroying our world. People now have to take to the street and shout there, but sometimes nobody even bothers to listen. Even the people on the streets sometimes never listen. Listening is the only way to resolve matters and reach a win win situation. But we barely get that because people haven't been listening for so long that they have become selfish. Everyone believes they are right and their ways are perfect, and the other is wrong. And whoever disagrees is an oppressor. It has become a matter of  'Who can shout the loudest' instead of 'Who is right'. People follow the loudest because they do not want to listen. They want the noise, but do not want to listen. Logic and reason get thrown out many times because people do not want to listen.

I challenge you to start listening. Be calm, observe the silence and listen. Because in our lack of listening skill, we have brewed a disaster. We've become so bad at listening that we never stop to listen to ourselves.

Stop, be calm and listen.

WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba

HEAL YOURSELF

The trials of life never end. Day by day we are being tried. There is always something that might break us or make us. Sometimes we break, sometimes we pretend not to break. And then there are those times where we remain unshaken. Our tolerance may be different, but one thing for sure; life will find a way to break you. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with life breaking you. But there it wrong for you to say broken. A broken heart will take you to your grave very early.

I too have had my moments with life. There were times when it broke me and I thought I could never come back. I had given in completely. It never got better. It became even worse when I gave up. I needed a solution, but I was looking for it at the wrong places. I was trying to understand why such misfortune had chosen me.Why did I have to be heartbroken. I had many other questions, all which sought an answer from the without.

But starting from within is the right way to approach it. Find the part that's sore the most, and ask yourself how you could heal it. Sometimes, the medicine we seek is us. We often neglect ourselves and give away all the love. We go all out to love others and give very little love to ourselves. We take our bricks and use them to build others. And when rain comes, we wonder why we have no shelter. And what we often fail to understand is that, by loving ourselves, we learn how to truly love. We learn how to treat others better by treating ourselves better. What we want for ourselves is what we will want for others. By loving ourselves, we make it easier and better for us to love others. We find happiness within us.

Not only do we find happiness, but we also become our own bestfriend. And we get to know ourselves so well that when something is not right we quickly pick it up. This helps avoid disasters caused by issues piling up unattended. We become much easier to live with and to love and be loved. We also learn to heal ourselves without much external forces. By healing ourselves, we become independent, and are less likely to seek validation outside of our being.

Love yourself. Heal yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be your bestfriend.

WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba

WE ARE WHAT ARE BECAUSE IT'S WHO WE ARE

I was having a conversation with a friend I recently made. We were going on about life and what it's like to grow up, to love, to be kind and to be selfless. She is very selfless and kind. I too naturally tend to be very selfless and kind to others. I go out of my way to help others. However, I am not going to be writing much about the good things I do but rather addressing a common misconception.

When people are kind and selfless, sometimes it doesn't rub off well with some people. It might be envy or it might be outright hate, but you get people who criticise someone for being kind and selfless. They may even spread rumours to try and tarnish the name of the person. It's like they are in competition with the person yet do the complete opposite of what the person does. They want to be seen and given attention, but do not want to be kind to others. They want people to call them good, but go about with a self centered and selfish attitude. In the end, they end up saying the person is pretending, or the person wants to be loved. But what they do not realise, is that they are merely stating who they are. But sometimes, the good people get affected by this and may lose that magic of kindness, love and selflessness. The reason I am writing this is to encourage and remind them that they are who they are because it is who they are, and they are not pretending or trying to be loved.

Good people do what they do because it is who they are. They do it without expecting anything in return. The do a lot, and will never go back to remind the person they have helped. Sometimes the person they have helped may become too proud, but they still remain humble and never remind the person. They give people more chances than they deserve. Even if people do not notice their efforts, they do not notice it because they are not doing it to be noticed. Had they been doing it to be noticed, they'd have given up already because they barely ever get noticed for who they are. They are like the elephant in the room that nobody notices. And they keep doing what they do.

However, they are still human. If they endure too much abuse, they get to a point where they are fed up. They usually never say it, but rather cut off the person. And it hurts them to cut off a person, but to protect their sanity and to carry on doing the good work, they need to cut off bad energy. It is not that they bad or hold grudges. They just know what they carry and do not want anything to hold them back. It is okay to cut off the bad ones.  But always remember, they do not want to be loved, or given attention. It is simply who they are. However, appreciating them really encourages them to self sacrifice in quest of a better world.

WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba

PAUSE

This week has gone by fast. I too was moving as fast as it was. Maybe a little bit too fast. But today it dawned on me that I needed to pause a bit. It is not wrong or bad to pause. It is needed, and often new ideas are born during or after the pause.

When you pause, you detach a bit and watch everything from the background. It is during that time that you see everything. You understand how the environment around you works together and each piece is needed for the greater functionality of the universe. You also get to see which parts around you need more attention and work than others. Without a pause you will never see these minor bits which may mess up the functionality of everything around you. It takes a brick to bring down a whole castle.

Every now and then, take a small pause. Detach from all the noise and clear your thoughts. With a clear mind you can easily come up with newer ideas on how to get things working better. During a moment of pause, you get to see everything as a mind map. You see how they are all connected, and how you could reconfigure everything for efficiency. The better efficiency you have, the less work you do and get to rest. A well-rested body function far better than one that has not rested. So, you can see how a pause, opens everything. It’s more like when you pause a movie; you get to see each detail of the scene which you might have missed had you not paused. It’s exactly like that even in real life.

Remember to pause and look at things from a little distance whenever it seems like things are working so well.

WITH LOVE…

Mbuelo Ramafamba