X MARKS THE SPOT

A wise man once told me, "draw an X and make sure you never miss it". But what he didn't tell me was that if somehow your X gets erased or you hit it way too many times, you have to draw another one.

This all probably doesn't make sense to you just as it didn't make sense to me when i first heard it. You have me to explain it to you. I had life to explain it. I will still leave out a bit for life to show you also. Learning and growing wouldn't be fun if you had everything explained to you.

With all that we do there are going to be exciting times and not so exciting times. Usually the less exciting times tend to go on for long. Fuelled by the lack of joy nor satisfaction, they often feel like a lifetime. But what we often miss is that these moments feast on our attention and focus. 

By focusing so much energy on how bad the situation is, you are  drawing an X over the bad side of it and aiming at it with all your ammo. You are instead supposed to be creating a target which you know will bring satisfaction and use that satisfaction to keep you motivated to go through the rest of the stuff. Often times you need not look outside the situation to find something to focus your attention on, and this usually leads to a greater solution overall. You can choose to have many focus points, but not too many, which upon hitting the X will build up together towards solving the overall problem. It's like being at a tactical shooting range training; you aim for the target, shoot then go to the next target. You have to make sure you hit the target before going to the next one. At the end of the day, you will see how much you've done by using the divide and conquer method. Just like how you eat your dinner in small chunks instead of trying to swallow down the whole meal at once. If you try that you most definitely choke. So sometimes the situation might seem impossible because of how you approach it. Make your X and make sure you never miss it, and once hit, move to the next.

Always remember that when the target is hit you need to move to the next target in order to progress. Progression is what we want, but we still want to enjoy every step of the way while we are at it. When you finish off your dinner, you do not just sit there and stare at the plate but instead clear the table and wash the plates. It's amazing how our much our daily activities can teach us a lot about focusing and shifting after hitting the target we set for ourselves, yet still driving satisfaction. Make everything a target to draw out the adventure side of it, and this way you will find great joy in achieving it. Just like how you go from preparing the meal, to eating, then doing the dishes and finally resting, the same can steps are what's needed to tackle everyday challenges. Most days you cook what you already know, some days you cook new things you've never cooked, But it's all about making that X. Set the target, hit it, get satisfaction and then jump to the next one.

WITH LOVE..

Mbuelo Ramafamba

UNLOCK THE BRIGHTER SIDE OF ANXIETY

The past 2 months have been very challenging and eye opening for me. I got to step out of my comfort zones, and my anxiety peaked. At first I saw it as a nerve wrecking experience, but as time goes the sun has started to rise and I am seeing a completely different picture. The anxiety is still at the very same peaks it has been, but the only thing that has changed is me.

Often times when we get anxious, we feel helpless and weak. Sometimes it feels right to rather accept defeat before it even comes. It will hit you so hard that you will wish you could sleep away whatever moment is making you anxious. But there are times where in you are stuck in an environment that makes you anxious and there's no option to just get up and leave. That is where I have been the past 2 months, but not necessarily stuck. Let's just say, there's more to lose by leaving the environment and more to gain by staying, yet the anxiety peaks each and every day.

The solution is pretty simple; you just need to change the attitude towards the anxiety. Very often we suffer more because we just want it to go away. However, you do need the anxiety and to find a way to work around it. It is a good thing and you need to shift it from being a monster to being motivation to tackle whatever makes you anxious. If you see it as a monster, it wins and you will not get anything done. Whenever you try to get up and do something, the chains will hold you back and forbid you from getting work done. So you need to loosen the chains, without going to far away from it.

Think of what could get worse if you allowed the anxiety to control you. Some things are permanent, so you can't allow them to happen. It could all go wrong and you would have no way of rewriting it and getting a second chance. Think of that each time you feel the anxiety. Then think of the benefits that would come if you went through with getting something done. What would happen if you don't fail ? Anxiety says "what if you fail?". Your reply should be "What if I succeed?" or "What do I stand to lose if I give in to my anxiety?".

The reality is, if you achieve it, you then starting seeing anxiety not  as much of a threat but a natural thing. It's like that one day when you finally stand up for yourself and fight off the bully. The one victory against anxiety is great motivation to do it again, because the feeling of beating it is heavenly.  Do it once and you will unleash a brighter side wherein anxiety is your motivation. You will feast on it to go further and further. It's all about shifting your mindset. When anxiety throws you in the ocean, swim your way through and break records.

You've got to win those battles in order to win the war.

WITH LOVE...
Mbuelo Ramafamba

THE NOW: YOU

The hardest thing to do is come up with an intro to any piece. I've been typing and erasing trying to get that perfect intro. But while i was busy fighting myself trying to decide what intro to in the piece I was intending to write, something dawned on me and now we have this post.

Most of us aren't aware of it, but we struggle with intros unnecessarily. Just as I was struggling with mine, someone else might be also trying to figure out how to go about something. It might be beginning your work day at the office, or simply where to start cleaning. Very often, too much time is wasted trying to figure this out. But could there be a way to deal with this? Where does one even start?

There might be no holy grail answer for this, but allow me to try. Often times we forget that we have little to no control when it comes to what life throws at us. We may wish and pray but life decides without consulting us. How ever, we do have control over two thing; the now and ourselves. And I believe these two things are all we need to get by. One has to understand the now, and also understand the self. When you understand the now, you also understand that the now only exists for now and if you miss it it's gone. So there's no time to think besides just doing it now because the now may be all you have. When you understand the now, you understand that you can only control what you do now, and should do what you can do and move on to the next. Sometimes it may also dawn on you that you actually are in the wrong place, and when it does, do not hesitate to go to the right place.

The one that is rather more difficult to grasp is the self. Most of us think we understand ourselves but do not realise we only understand what we wish to be and not what we truly are. This is the reason why so many of us stay in toxic situation which end up destroying us because we do not take time to understand who we  are. We often deny who we are for who we wish to be and thus never realise our full potential. Without knowing the self, we end up falling victim to the pressures of society, and ultimately dig our own graves and then bury ourselves in it. Know yourself no matter how bad you are and only then will you be able to build yourself up. Stop wanting a fully built house, and start realising you have the material and should build it yourself.

In the end of it all, it's all about THE NOW and YOU.

With love...
Mbuelo Ramafamba

It isn't ours to keep

It has taken me years of observation, trying to figure out the cause of many of our world's problems. There's just too much going on, that there must be some sort of cause for this. I would love to say I found the cause but I haven't .

And what I found is life. Our lives are what bothers us and causes us to not achieve much. We often think that life is ours or that we own it. So most of the times we go out to try and never die. The reason many get rich, exercise etc, is because deep down we all don't want to die. The reason we have corruption, crime etc, is because someone is just trying to survive; that is to not die.

We are all so obsessed with living forever that we forget DEATH IS AN EVENTUALITY. It doesn't matter how long you try to delay it, but death is bound to happen. The reason we are on earth is not to delay or fight death, but to just simply live. We do not have to amass so much of this world's vanities. The reality is our lives aren't ours to keep. That fact alone should be enough to teach us that it is better to have peace, and be peaceful and loving while on earth.

Your life is not yours to keep, so do not waste the privilege. Love, teach, be kind and share peace in this life. Accept life for what it is and let go of all thoughts. Start each new day as blank paper waiting to paint on it a bright and colourful picture.

Enjoy life. It isn't yours to keep. Do not fear death, for you will live in fear forever. Embrace it and understand that death is the end point to life on earth, and there's no escaping it. We are all going to die. NOTHING IN THIS WORLD IS OURS TO KEEP. WE ALL DIE AND LIVE IT BEHIND.
VANITY.

With Love...
Mbuelo Ramafamba

Born Free But Planted

Born Free But Planted

We are born
Born free to die yet we never die
Each time we are seeded
And we become trees by the side of the road
Waving with the winds as thousands drive by
Forever there and having not reached our destination
We wither and blossom with the seasons
Ever growing with no waters near by
Nourished by the blood of those who perish
Each day another soul is distracted
The innocent seeded by the reckless
But the trees grow by the numbers
And remain by the side of the roads

We never die
We become trees
And give shadows to the crosses and flowers
The ones you leave in pain and regret.
If you knew it was the last goodbye
You'd have given us those flowers in person
Or better yet preached to us the gospel
But now all that is left is hope
Hopeless hope that we make heaven
Hopeless hope that we forgive
Hopeless hope that we know we were loved
But the winds blow us to and fro
For we are trees
Growing by the wayside

Sometimes it's just "OKAY"

Life is a master of curveballs. It doesn't matter who you are, but one way or another you will get it. Sometimes it happens time and time again. You go onto the ground expecting it and ready for it but it still gets you. That is the unfortunate truth about life.

Situations in life will keep happening and trying to knock us down. Sometimes we will be left devastated. Even with all the preparation, there are times when things are just bound to explode in our faces. It doesn't matter the intentions behind it or how innocent we may be, but when it's your day, it's your day.

No matter how much of it keeps happening, one should never give up on life. You may want to shift positions and do something different but never give up trying to make a better future for yourself. It is OKAY to get hit hard. It is OKAY to feel like you have fought long and hard and it about time you gave up. It is OKAY. All those thought are OKAY. And maybe some of them are correct and you should act on them.

But at the end of the day, you must know that sometimes you need to step back and let go of it all. Sometimes you just want to restart. Sometimes it is OKAY to let go and rest. Resting doesn't mean it's over. It only means you are tired. And it's OKAY. It's OKAY to lose the battle. You may have lost this battle but the journey ahead is still long. Unchain yourself. Don't feel bad. It's OKAY to fail. Embrace it and start over.

Sometimes the joy of life is not in always winning, but in losing and always coming back from a different angle until your day comes to WIN ONCE AND FOR ALL.

WITH LOVE..
Mbuelo Ramafamba

FAITH CAN CALM IT ALL

Today i want to share with you some knowledge based on my own experience with life. It is not hidden knowledge. Neither is it knowledge that is new. You may have heard this before somewhere and somehow you forgot it or at least let me say you forgot to apply it in your daily life. This is knowledge from the bible, but it can be applied by anyone of any faith or lack thereof. It should help remind you of Faith in hard times.

I will take my reading from the two books.

Matthew 8: 23-27 (New International Version/ NIV)

23 Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. 24 Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. 25 The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”
 
26 He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.
 
27 The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!”

Mark 4:35-41 (New International Version/ NIV)

³⁵ That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, “Let us go over to the other side.” ³⁶ Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him. ³⁷ A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. ³⁸ Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”
³⁹ He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.
⁴⁰ He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”
⁴¹ They were terrified and asked each other, “Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!”

As people living in this life, we are often faced with difficult situations. Tough situations which sometimes break us completely. They instill fear and despair into us. We forget who we are and start feeling sorry for ourselves. But little do we know that we have the answer already.

Sometimes life will get very difficult to a point wherein we won't understand what our lives have become. But the one mistake we make most times is asking "WHY ME?". We let our situations deteriorate our faith. We let our situations to weaken and drown us. We are quick to cry. We cry for help and none arrives.

In the first scripture of Matthew that I shared, we saw how the disciples had no faith. They feared they would die. "Where there is no faith, there is fear of/and death". By letting your faith deteriorate, you are letting fear creep in and take control of your life. When you start doubting yourself and feel like giving in, that which you fear the most starts to manifest. But way to often we find ourselves drowning in weakness and self pity parties. "why is life so unfair, why me, why am i suffering, why do people hate me, why this, why that?".  The list goes on. I've also been there and one thing I learned is that it is very addictive. Your words start to destroy you more than the situation itself. Because you lost faith in yourself and God, you remain naked to any force that comes against you. You become extremely vulnerable. The biggest sign that your faith may be shaking is doubt, or asking God, the universe or life the question "Why?".  And the answer to that is obvious. "YOU LOST YOUR FAITH IN YOURSELF AND GOD!!".

Instead of panicking when situations arise, be calm. You can never think properly in panic. You first need to calm yourself, build up your faith and courage and simply tell the situation to be calm. Instead of giving in, remind the situation who you are and that you are much greater than it and inside you lives He who is greater than all forces. As a human being, you have great power given to you through your creator. And Jesus was not only on Earth to be a savior only. It was the main reason yes, but he was also here to show us that even in the human flesh, we can command and overcome. He was reminding us of the power that lies dormant within us. TELL THE SITUATION TO BE CALM. Learn to order situations in your life with faith. Do not listen to doubt or negative thoughts. Speak with authority and tell whatever situation to "BE CALM". Tell it "Quiet! Be Still!". 

The world will be in awe at how you can do such great thing and achieve so much in life. Just learn to speak with authority and take control of your life. 

"Quiet! Be Calm!. Peace! Be Still".